“If God Gives You Melons…”

I’ve always been a voracious reader. 
But it can take me a year to read a book.

The fact is, I started to get left behind in Grade 5.
By the time I hit Grade 7, I couldn’t keep up.

Things just snowballed from there.

I wasn’t a bad kid.
By and large, I think the teachers liked me.

I just sat at the back of the classroom and didn’t say a word.

The truth is, I never got much better than 50% on any test in high school.
I think the highest mark I ever got in high school was a 62.

There was just no way that I could keep up with the workload.

When I got to the end of Grade 12, I went through the graduation ceremony with my Grad Class.

But when my final marks were sent to me…
I never opened the envelope. 
I didn’t want to know.

I still, to this day, have no idea.

I wanted to go to college more than anything.
But I didn’t have the marks and deep down, I knew that I couldn’t keep up.
There was just no way.

I used to joke (and still do) that once it became clear that I wasn’t going to play in the NHL, that I needed to find a rock-solid, foolproof “Plan B”.
You know, something to fall back on…

So I became a “Musician”.

But, the truth is, I really had no other options. 

I was envious of people who would go to school and become a Doctor, a Lawyer, a Teacher, an Airline Pilot
or an Architect…

Oh man, how I wanted to be an Architect.
But I knew that I couldn’t handle the workload.

I just felt dumb.
All the time.

Since I got out of High School, I’ve somehow managed to walk between the raindrops and my Dyslexic diagnosis went… undiagnosed.

Then in May, Jenny, Ruby and I were driving to Calgary for my show at the Ironwood.
As we were rolling in on the Deerfoot when I read a highway sign out loud.

Both Jenny and Ruby said, at the same time, “You just read that sign completely backwards…”

Then in June, I was in Toronto for a few days and there were a couple things that happened while I was there, that made me think, “Ok. There’s something wrong with me. What the Hell is going on?”

I called Jenny that evening and told her my concerns.

She reminded me about our drive into Calgary and how I read the sign backwards.

I did some research for “Common Characteristics of Undiagnosed Adult Dyslexia…”
I checked all the boxes. 

But I still wanted to find out for sure.

So, over the last three or four months, I’ve been dealing with this stuff head-on.
Meeting with doctors and therapists in an attempt to get to the bottom of everything.

In late September, Jenny and I met with my doctor to go over his findings.

You know, I always wished that I could be one of those people who could chew through a novel in a weekend.

But that was never me,
and now I know it never will be.

Jenny can read ten books a month.
I’m lucky if I read ten pages in a month.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t really change anything.

But it does bring me peace of mind.
So I’ve got that going for me… which is nice.

Mike Plume

Friday, October 18, 2019